A Biblical View of Singleness
Discover how Scripture flips the cultural script on being unmarried, revealing a calling far richer than the world imagines.
-
The Unmarried and the Widowed
25 Now concerning[a] the betrothed,[b] I have no command from the Lord, but I give my judgment as one who by the Lord's mercy is trustworthy. 26 I think that in view of the present[c] distress it is good for a person to remain as he is. 27 Are you bound to a wife? Do not seek to be free. Are you free from a wife? Do not seek a wife. 28 But if you do marry, you have not sinned, and if a betrothed woman[d] marries, she has not sinned. Yet those who marry will have worldly troubles, and I would spare you that. 29 This is what I mean, brothers: the appointed time has grown very short. From now on, let those who have wives live as though they had none, 30 and those who mourn as though they were not mourning, and those who rejoice as though they were not rejoicing, and those who buy as though they had no goods, 31 and those who deal with the world as though they had no dealings with it. For the present form of this world is passing away.
32 I want you to be free from anxieties. The unmarried man is anxious about the things of the Lord, how to please the Lord. 33 But the married man is anxious about worldly things, how to please his wife, 34 and his interests are divided. And the unmarried or betrothed woman is anxious about the things of the Lord, how to be holy in body and spirit. But the married woman is anxious about worldly things, how to please her husband. 35 I say this for your own benefit, not to lay any restraint upon you, but to promote good order and to secure your undivided devotion to the Lord.
36 If anyone thinks that he is not behaving properly toward his betrothed,[e] if his[f] passions are strong, and it has to be, let him do as he wishes: let them marry—it is no sin. 37 But whoever is firmly established in his heart, being under no necessity but having his desire under control, and has determined this in his heart, to keep her as his betrothed, he will do well. 38 So then he who marries his betrothed does well, and he who refrains from marriage will do even better.
39 A wife is bound to her husband as long as he lives. But if her husband dies, she is free to be married to whom she wishes, only in the Lord. 40 Yet in my judgment she is happier if she remains as she is. And I think that I too have the Spirit of God.
What Does the Gospel Say About Singleness?
In the final section of 1 Corinthians 7, the Apostle Paul addressed one of the most misunderstood topics in contemporary Christianity: singleness.
Writing to believers from diverse backgrounds who were struggling to understand how following Jesus should reshape their relationships and life choices, Paul delivered a message that was both revolutionary and deeply pastoral.
His instruction to the single believers in Corinth was consistent with his counsel throughout the chapter: remain where you are. Just as he told married couples not to separate physically and encouraged workers not to abandon their vocations, Paul urged single believers to embrace their unmarried state rather than rushing toward marriage.
This teaching raises a crucial question for modern believers: What does the gospel say about singleness? Whether someone is unmarried due to never marrying, divorce, or the death of a spouse, how does following Jesus shape the experience of being single?
From 1 Corinthians 7:25-40, three foundational truths emerge that provide a clear, biblical theology of singleness. These truths challenge both ancient and modern misconceptions about the unmarried life.
1) Singleness Has Great Value in the Kingdom of God
The Apostle Paul began his teaching with a startling declaration in verses 7-8:
“I wish that all were as I myself am. But each has his own gift from God, one of one kind and one of another. To the unmarried and the widows, I say that it is good for them to remain single, as I am.”
Paul presented singleness not as a consolation prize or temporary waiting period, but as a gift from God. And not just any gift, but a good gift. For a former rabbi of Paul’s stature, marriage would have been expected, likely even required. His current singleness was probably the result of either his wife’s death or her departure following his conversion to Christianity. Regardless of the circumstances, Paul embraced his unmarried state as something to be honored and valued both personally and within the church community.
This perspective stood in stark contrast to both Roman and Jewish cultural expectations. Roman culture viewed the family as the fundamental social unit, reflecting imperial values and ensuring social stability. Single men and women could face legal penalties for remaining unmarried. Jewish culture similarly saw family as the primary means through which God’s blessing was transmitted from generation to generation. Singleness, barrenness, and childlessness were often viewed as evidence of divine displeasure. One rabbi was quoted as saying, “Any man who has no wife is no proper man.”
Modern culture presents its own distortions. Contemporary society places supreme value on sexual expression and romantic fulfillment, suggesting that a person cannot be truly human without them. The cultural narrative implies that everything in life serves as a mere prologue until one finds romantic and physical intimacy. Without these experiences, a person is doomed to loneliness and relational isolation.
Yet the historic witness of Christianity offers a radically different perspective, one modeled by Christ Himself. In Matthew 19:11-12, Jesus declared:
“Not everyone can receive this saying, but only those to whom it is given. For there are eunuchs who have been so from birth, and there are eunuchs who have been made eunuchs by men, and there are eunuchs who have made themselves eunuchs for the sake of the kingdom of heaven. Let the one who is able to receive this receive it.”
Jesus affirmed that singleness and childlessness possess great value in God’s kingdom. Some people, willingly or unwillingly, remain single for the sake of the gospel. Significantly, Jesus spoke these words not from a distance but as one who willingly became human and lived His entire earthly life as a single man. He chose not to marry, not to pursue romantic relationships, and not to experience physical intimacy.
As the author Sam Allberry observed:
“Jesus is the most complete and fully human person who ever lived. So, his not being married is not incidental. It shows us that none of these things—marriage, romantic fulfillment, sexual experience—is intrinsic to being a full human being.”
To suggest that celibacy is dehumanizing implies that Jesus Himself was somehow incomplete or subhuman.
The gift of singleness provides unique opportunities for wholehearted devotion to God. Paul explained in verses 32-35 that unmarried believers can focus their attention entirely on “the things of the Lord, how to please the Lord” and “how to be holy in body and spirit.”
Unlike married individuals whose interests are necessarily divided between spouse and spiritual matters, single believers can pursue “undivided devotion to the Lord.”
If marriage shows us the shape of the gospel through its picture of Christ and the church, singleness demonstrates the gospel’s sufficiency. Single believers live as signposts pointing to the ultimate reality that all believers will one day experience: standing individually before Christ in perfect, complete intimacy with Him. They showcase to a watching world that Christ alone satisfies the deepest longings of the human heart.
2) Those Leaving Singleness Should Not Rush Into Marriage
Because singleness possesses such high value and enables wholehearted devotion to God, the Apostle Paul urged extreme caution for those considering marriage.
Many discussions about singleness, either directly or indirectly, present it as a temporary state whose primary purpose is preparation for marriage. But 1 Corinthians 7 reveals a different perspective: singleness is so valuable that those contemplating leaving it should move slowly, carefully, and with great wisdom.
Paul acknowledged the tension many single believers experience. While affirming singleness as a gift, he recognized that some might prefer to “return” this gift if given the choice. The chapter holds these realities in biblical tension: singleness is genuinely good, believers should be slow to leave it, yet desiring marriage is not wrong, and marrying is not sinful.
In addressing betrothal—a commitment similar to modern engagement but with much higher stakes—Paul emphasized two crucial areas requiring wisdom and caution.
Who You Marry Matters
In verse 39, Paul instructed that believers are “free to be married to whom she wishes, only in the Lord.” This requirement to marry “in the Lord” means marrying another genuine follower of Jesus. Paul reinforced this principle in 2 Corinthians 6:14, warning against being “unequally yoked.”
This instruction isn’t narrow-minded or status-conscious; it acknowledges that spiritual intimacy forms a crucial component of marriage. When spouses don’t share faith in Christ, they cannot truly understand each other’s decision-making compass, values, and vision for the future. As Tim Keller noted, a believer married to an unbeliever faces two destructive options: either hiding their faith to maintain peace or abandoning their faith for the sake of the relationship.
When You Marry Matters
Paul also emphasized timing, referring to the “present distress” in Corinth and noting that “the appointed time has grown very short” (verses 26, 29). Whether this referred to Christ’s return or specific local circumstances like famine, Paul recognized that certain seasons are inappropriate for pursuing marriage. Times of major transition, clouded judgment, or misaligned spiritual priorities may require saying no to marriage temporarily.
These considerations don’t trap single believers but honor the high value of singleness. Since the unmarried state is so exalted, leaving it for marriage should never be rushed.
Yet Paul clearly affirmed that marriage itself is not sinful. Twice he declared, “If you do marry, you have not sinned” (verses 28, 36). Single believers who desire marriage are not wrong for having this longing or for eventually pursuing it.
For many single believers, the pressing question isn’t whether they should desire marriage, but why their desires remain unfulfilled. If marriage is good and the desire isn’t sinful, why hasn’t God answered these prayers?
Scripture teaches that God gives us desires for many good things, such as spouses, meaningful work, children, and bright futures for our families. When desires and reality don’t align, it’s not because God doesn’t see us, doesn’t love us, or lacks a plan for our lives that exceeds our imagination. Our prayers don’t meet with silence, even when they meet with “no” or “not yet.”
We know this because our Savior in Gethsemane prayed, “Let this cup pass from me,” and cried from the cross, “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?” Jesus’ prayers were answered with “no” so that our prayers could always reach the Father’s ears. Because of Christ’s demonstrated love on the cross, we can trust the Giver of every gift, including the gift of our current circumstances.
As Annie Downs and David Platt discussed in a podcast, it’s possible to hold desires for changed circumstances while faithfully stewarding the gift of singleness. Paul modeled this tension when he wrote to the Philippians about desiring to be with the Lord while remaining content to serve on earth. Such contentment doesn’t come through human effort but through the Holy Spirit’s empowerment, resting in the sufficiency and goodness of the gospel.
3) Those Who Remain Single Find New Family and New Mission in the Church
Contemporary culture perpetuates the lie that single life inevitably leads to loneliness and childlessness. For 2,000 years, the church has offered a better alternative to this false narrative, providing both family and mission to unmarried believers.
The church’s track record hasn’t been perfect. Throughout history, good and bad have often existed side by side. Sociologist Rodney Stark noted in The Rise of Christianity that the early church’s support for singles was revolutionary, particularly in how they cared for widows so well financially that remarriage became a choice based on desire rather than survival necessity.
However, incorrect theologies have sometimes diminished both marriage and singleness. The Western church, in a well-intentioned effort to honor marriage, has occasionally participated in cultural family idolatry. This has made unmarried believers feel inferior or shamed, caused divorced individuals to feel like failures, and left widows feeling forgotten.
Church leadership and married members must acknowledge these failures and commit to building healthier communities. Yet even while recognizing past shortcomings, we must distinguish between God’s design and human failures.
As Glenn Scrivener illustrates, God’s design resembles a straight line, while human failures create crooked, wavy lines. The church’s role is to cling to the straight line while acknowledging the crooked lines, knowing something is broken precisely because we can point to God’s perfect design.
God’s design for the church provides both family and mission to single believers.
New Family
Single believers aren’t doomed to loneliness but are welcomed into God’s family. When believers are baptized, they’re baptized with first and middle names but not last names because they’re joining a new spiritual family with a new spiritual reality in Christ.
Throughout the church, singles and married individuals come together to live and serve in community. Children in the church learn to call unmarried adults “uncle” and “aunt.” Rich relationships form in family ministry, college and young adult groups, and Sunday school classes specifically designed for single women and men. Through the gospel and the local church, those who feel lonely discover genuine family.
New Mission
If the cultural lie suggests single people are doomed to childlessness, the gospel reveals that God’s family receives blessings through spiritual children found in evangelism and discipleship.
This represents a fundamental shift from Old Testament to New Testament blessing patterns. In the Old Testament, children were sources of blessing through whom the nation grew, and God’s favor was transmitted. Hannah’s tears in 1 Samuel reflected not just personal sorrow but the spiritual reality that she couldn’t pass on God’s blessing to future generations.
The New Testament completely transforms this paradigm. Blessing is no longer passed through biological children in the home but through spiritual children in the church. Through evangelism and discipleship, the church grows and God’s blessing advances. Being single or childless no longer connects to spiritual legacy; in fact, singleness provides greater opportunity for wholehearted devotion to making disciples.
The story of Philip and the Ethiopian eunuch in Acts 8 illustrates this beautifully. The eunuch was studying Isaiah 56, where God promised eunuchs who keep His covenant, “I will give in my house and within my walls a monument and a name better than sons and daughters. I will give them an everlasting name that shall not be cut off.” Philip explained how the gospel fulfills this promise—through Christ, the eunuch would have spiritual children, grandchildren, and great-grandchildren through discipleship. The eunuch believed, was baptized, and entered both the family and the mission of God.
Single believers who steward their gift faithfully, directing wholehearted, undivided attention toward the Lord, bear incredible fruit for the gospel. Their service is seen by God and others, earning the commendation, “Well done, good and faithful servant.”
Living Together in Gospel Community
The high value of singleness presented in Scripture, modeled by Christ, taught by Paul, and practiced by the early church, tells unmarried believers they’re not isolated but are integral parts of God’s family and mission. It tells married believers that their families are part of the larger community and mission of God.
Together, single and married believers can find deep community, live and serve alongside one another, and glorify God while making disciples of Jesus Christ among all peoples. Just as 1 Corinthians 7 weaves together teachings on marriage and singleness side by side, believers can serve side by side as well.
This community life provides a foretaste of the ultimate reality awaiting all believers. At the marriage supper of the Lamb, we’ll sit together not based on marital status, vocation, or earthly achievements, but because Jesus Christ, through His life, death, and resurrection, looked at our loneliness and declared, “I want him. I want her to be part of this new family.”
In a world confused about singleness and marriage, the church must speak with clarity about the value and dignity of all people made in God’s image. God doesn’t evaluate us based on relationship status, career success, age, or achievements, but gives us worth simply because we reflect His image to the world.
Whether single or married, all believers are called to receive and steward their gifts faithfully while supporting others in their various callings. Single believers should feel God’s love, find welcome and belonging in the church family, and be mobilized into meaningful mission. Those who desire marriage can do so with hope and contentment rooted in the gospel. Married believers must resist cultural lies that create artificial divisions between singleness and marriage, ensuring all members of the spiritual family feel welcome and included.
The gospel transforms how we understand every aspect of life, including singleness. When the church embraces this biblical vision, single and married believers together become a powerful testimony to the sufficiency of Christ and the beauty of His kingdom, making much of Jesus’ name and the transforming power of His gospel.
TL;DR
Paul’s teaching in 1 Corinthians 7 shows that singleness is a good and valuable gift, not a consolation prize.
It offers unique opportunities for undivided devotion to God, requires wisdom when moving toward marriage, and provides new family and mission within the church.
Whether single or married, believers are called to embrace their God-given season for His glory.