Why Love is the Mark of a Spirit-Filled Life
Spiritual gifts without love are empty. Discover how the supremacy of love defines true spirituality, holiness, and life in Christ.
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The Way of Love
1 If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. 2 And if I have prophetic powers, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. 3 If I give away all I have, and if I deliver up my body to be burned,[a] but have not love, I gain nothing.
4 Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant 5 or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful;[b] 6 it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. 7 Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.
8 Love never ends. As for prophecies, they will pass away; as for tongues, they will cease; as for knowledge, it will pass away. 9 For we know in part and we prophesy in part, 10 but when the perfect comes, the partial will pass away. 11 When I was a child, I spoke like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I gave up childish ways. 12 For now we see in a mirror dimly, but then face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I have been fully known.
13 So now faith, hope, and love abide, these three; but the greatest of these is love.
The Supremacy of Love: When Nothing Else Matters
JESUS: “Love one another, even as I have loved you, that you also love one another. By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.” John 13:34-35
This was a commandment of Christ for us, but it’s also how Jesus taught us to love in the same way He loved—by laying His life down for others.
The primary word for love in the New Testament is agape. While not popular in Greek literature, it became the defining word for Christian love. This is crucial: agape love has nothing to do with your passions and affections, because you cannot command an emotion. Since Jesus commands you to love, agape love is a choice of the will.
Love for a Christ-follower is a choice. It’s not rooted in what we feel; instead, it’s a choice we make.
The Corinthian believers were fighting over spiritual gifts, struggling with whether gifts made them feel spiritual or were signs of being spiritual. Some wanted nothing to do with spiritual gifts, while others took pride in their gifts. This is why the Apostle Paul concluded chapter 12 with the phrase, “Let me show you a better, a more excellent way” (1 Corinthians 12:31).
If you truly desire to pursue God and to be filled and controlled by the Holy Spirit, then you will choose to love. This will be the grandest marker that you belong to Jesus Christ. Thus, if you’re in the Spirit and not living as a carnal Christian, who is a Christian living out of your old nature, there will be love. This is why “the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control” (Galatians 5:22-23). The first fruit is love.
Love Is Primary for the Believer
“If I speak in the tongues of men and angels, but have not love, I am a noisy gong or clanging cymbal. And if I have prophetic powers and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith to remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give away all I have, and if I deliver up my body to be burned, but have not love, I gain nothing.” 1 Corinthians 13:1-3
Consider the heart of that verse: A person with incredible prophetic gifting, who eloquently proclaims God’s truths, and gives away all their possessions to the poor, yet without love, none of that means anything before God.
The Apostle Paul is saying that even if he could speak with the tongues of men with great fluency in all languages, and even if he could speak with the eloquence of angels as they spoke to the Old Testament saints. Still, if he cannot love, then he would be like a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal.
If it’s not spoken, shared, ministered, or ministry expressed with a heart of love, it only resembles a dull, lifeless, dead instrument. It may be loud, impressive, or even persuasive, and these things may win admiration from others, but as far as God is concerned, they mean absolutely nothing if the motive behind them is not love for God and people.
If you’re a Christian, meaning you are a follower of Christ, then love is your nature. This describes the nature of a person who knows God.
“Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God, and everyone who loves is born of God and knows God. The one who does not love does not know God, for God is love.” 1 John 4:7-8
That verse puts it plainly: God is love. While we understand that God’s nature is holy, you cannot be holy without being loving. What we see in 1 Corinthians 13 is the Apostle Paul expressing what this looks like in practicality. For the agape love of God to operate in your life, that kind of love is patient, kind, doesn’t get jealous of others, doesn’t brag, nor is it arrogant.
This word “patience” in the original language means the ability to be wronged again and again and have the power not to retaliate or grow bitter. For a believer operating out of the Spirit of God, it takes a long time for them to flame out or explode.
What was happening in the Corinthian church was that many believers had spiritual gifts operating in their lives, yet they were boastful and flamboyant with their spiritual gifts. This demonstrates that you can be right about spiritual gifts but wrong about the spirit in which you operate in the way God has gifted you.
Love Responds to Others
A carnal Christian reacts to others, but a spiritual Christian responds to others.
A carnal Christian has a critical spirit, but a spiritual Christian has a constructive spirit.
A carnal Christian is independent, but a spiritual Christian is interdependent and collaborative, recognizing that they’re part of a greater body, the body of Christ.
1 Corinthians 13:4 tells us that “Love is patient and kind. It does not envy or boast. It is not arrogant.” All of these are characteristics that are relational in nature.
Patience means the ability to be wronged again and again and have the power (the agape love of God in you) not to retaliate or grow bitter. Jesus said, “In the last days, the love of many will grow cold” (Matthew 24:12). When He said that, it’s impossible for an unbeliever to have the agape of God dwelling in them. Only Christians have agape, because you cannot expect an unbeliever to function with the love of God in their life. But in the last days, agape will grow cold, and Jesus goes on to say that many will be offended.
Have you been around someone who’s easily offended? They’re always offended at something. Be encouraged by Scripture to choose by the grace of God, because, as a reminder, it’s a choice, not a feeling, not to be offended. When somebody says something demeaning, give them grace to grow and mature. You have the same fallenness in your own life. Choose not to be offended. That way, you stay free in Jesus.
Don’t get bogged down with being offended or building a wall with another brother or sister in Christ. This is why believers are instructed to “bear with one another” (Colossians 3:13), to forgive one another, and to go to one another if there’s something you need to work out.
“Love is not rude. It does not insist on its own way. It is not irritable or resentful. It does not rejoice in wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth.” 1 Corinthians 13:5-6
Love is not provoked. This word “provoked” in the original Greek represents spurs used on a horse. When you overspur a horse, it’s provoked.
When your spouse’s first words aren’t “I love you” but “Would you take out the trash?”—are you provoked? Do you let that be a spur in your side? When your kids say, “Tell him to quit touching me” as you’re riding down the road, can you correct without being provoked? Christian love is not provoked. Christian love doesn’t lose its temper.
Scripture says biblical love also doesn’t take into account a wrong suffered. The word in the original language literally means bookkeeping. When you love the way God commands you to love, you don’t keep a list of past wrongs. This disease is eating up Christians and ruining marriages.
Real love forgives. Real love tears up the list. Real love doesn’t return to the previous hurt or withhold love in some type of passive-aggressive behavior. By an act of the will, you choose. You don’t wait for the feeling to sweep over you because it’s not going to happen. You choose to let go.
“Love does not rejoice in unrighteousness.” 1 Corinthians 13:6
Love never brags about sin. Love doesn’t hear, read, or watch sin with approval. Love never rejoices when others are hurt, even when it can be interpreted as some sense of justice.
Love rejoices with the truth. Who is the truth? Jesus. Where is the truth found? In the Word of God.
When truth exposes sin in your heart and life, do you rejoice because you’re growing closer to Jesus? Can you say with David:
”Search me, O God, and know my heart! Try me and know my thoughts! And see if there be any grievous way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting!” Psalm 139:23-24
That wasn’t because David thought he was polished or above anyone. It was because David yearned for intimacy with the one true, sovereign God of the universe.
When others respond to the truth, are you glad? When the truth in Jesus saves someone or they move and grow in their sanctification, will you rejoice?
Love Responds to Circumstances
“Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.” 1 Corinthians 13:7
Love bears all things, which means the pattern of love is reluctant to spread a rumor, seeks to cover up gossip, and aims to suppress slander. Do you seek to protect the reputation of others, or are you quick to tear a good name apart? Love labors not to talk about anybody negatively.
Love also believes all things, meaning as a Christian, you believe others have the best intentions. When your spouse had to make a tough decision alone because you weren’t there, did you believe the best about him or her? When your church leaders have to make a tough decision, love says you believe the best in them. The love of the Spirit seeks to believe the best about others in general.
Love also hopes all things—literally expecting, hoping, wanting God to do good things in the lives of others.
Love also endures all things—literally in the heat of the battle, love continues the selfless fight to do what is best for the people around you, even when it’s costly. Those who don’t love give up on others. Those who choose to love never give up on others.
When you read that, if a situation comes to mind and you think, “I can’t love like that. I can’t do that.” May I challenge you? Yes, you can, because you have the power of God and His way available to you.
Scripture reminds us that “God has not given you a spirit of timidity, but he has given you a spirit of power, love, and discipline, a sound mind” (2 Timothy 1:7). It also encourages us “Not by might, not by power, but by my Spirit, says the Lord” (Zechariah 4:6).
Breaking Free from the Anesthesia
Let us break out of the anesthesia of carnal Christianity, living in the power of what you and you alone can do. A recovery of love is really the recovery of Jesus in your life. A recovery of love is the recovery of the power of the Holy Spirit that you operate out of. It’s in His power that you choose for God. Love will do the right thing, which is often the hard thing, for the sake of the real thing.
Out of past experiences, some of you have been betrayed. You’ve been wounded. Some of you have been abused. Some of you have been lied to or lied about. Some of you have experienced a friend who turned their back on you. Now, out of the revelation of those experiences, you cower.
But when we grasp the nature of our heavenly Father who wants to heal, free you, and show you a new and living way—the way of agape love—you get freed. You understand you don’t have to cower in His revelation, because in His revelation, God’s motive is pure love for you. His motive is to liberate you. His motive is to heal your heart, set you free from bitterness, unforgiveness, and shame. He wants to liberate you into the way of agape love that truly sets you free, that heals your wounded heart, and conditions you into a way of life rather than a pattern of fear.
Love will do the right thing, which is often the hard thing, for the sake of the real thing. But it’s not by your power. “It’s by my power, says the Lord” (Zechariah 4:6). God has not given you a spirit of timidity or fear, but of love and power and a sound mind, disciplined for His glory.
Draw near to Him. Know that He’s not a God of condemnation. He’s a God of light and life. James 4:8 shares, “Draw near to God, and he will draw near to you.” John 3:17 reminds us that Jesus did not come to condemn you, “but in order that the world might be saved through Him.” One of the root words of “save” in the original language is to heal you, not only to birth you into eternal life, but to heal your broken heart. To heal you in relationship with Jesus for His glory.
Move in the power of God’s love that does the right thing, that is often the hard thing, to choose to love for the sake of the real thing. There is no condemnation in Him. Give thanks for new life in Him. Let that new life flow not only in you but through you in the name and power of Jesus.
TL;DR
Love is primary. Even the most impressive spiritual gifts—prophecy, tongues, sacrifice—mean nothing without love.
Love is patient, kind, and humble. It refuses to retaliate, boast, or keep score; it seeks the good of others above self.
Love endures. True love bears, believes, hopes, and perseveres through every circumstance without giving up.
Love reflects Christ. The Holy Spirit produces this supernatural love in believers, proving that God Himself dwells within them.
